The Narrow Walls to The Heart
I open up the door and before me stands a giant wall, roughly three-hundred feet tall. Pearl white, smooth like ivory keys of a grand piano. No cracks, no blemishes, just a wall of solid white. I approach with a curious heart.
Nearing the wall, a door appears, a red door, only a few inches taller than me. It holds a golden knob with no key hole. With my world as it is, I see no caution not to open it. Everything at this point feels hopeless.
My heart feels trapped and I see no end to my suffering. My ribs feel constricted upon my heart and my breathing has become shallow. So, I do what any desperate soul would do, I open the the door. As I do, a bright light shines for a moment.
I can't see at first, but I adjust. I step through and there, in front of me is another wall. Another large standing wall, only ten feet from me. No door appears like the first, I immediately turn around to return to the first door, but it has vanished.
I am startled, a lunge of fear grasps at my throat and I begin to wonder with a raising pulse where I am. I look around, I see nothing, no windows, doors, signs, just a pearl white wall extending hundreds of feet to my left and right.
So, with what little hope I have left, I look right and I look left, trying to keep my panicking mind to a minimum. After a few moments, I choose a direction, I go left. Why I chose left, I am not sure, except for a tingle in the depth of my gut?
As I walk along trapped between two walls. I begin to think, I think how I ended up here, what doors I had opened before this. What door did I open that led me to this situation? Or, which one did I not open that led me here?
I travel further down, as I do, I suddenly come to a turn, I can only go left again. This time though, there is less room to travel. I walk only for a minute or two and come to another path. Well, two to be exact, one left, one right.
I choose right, but after a few minutes it becomes a dead end. So, I turn around and choose to go left. Traveling down the left path it begins to narrow like a cave pressing in from both sides. A tinge of claustrophobia expands in my mind. I do what I can to fight it off, I take in a heavy breath and then release it, I turn myself sideways and begin to think of what may be on the other side.
I close my eyes and start making my way through. I can feel the walls pressing in on me as if trying to hold me in place. My chest and back firmly press against the walls, it becomes difficult to breathe.
So, I pick up the pace, I come out the other side. I step out from the narrowing walls and look around. It is a large open space. Four walls, all standing the same height as the first wall I encountered. But this time, each wall is a different color.
One is red, one is black, one is white, and another is grey. I don't know what to think. I then approach the red wall in front of me. It feels warm, I move to the black one, it feels cold, then the grey, it feels, lonely, I move to the white, it feels welcoming, yet mysterious.
I then place my hand upon the white wall and walk through the entire open space with my hand on the walls. Feeling what each has to present as my hand passes over. Again, I feel what I felt standing near them. But this time they become intense.
I then decide to close my eyes at each wall and place my hand upon it. When I do, each wall gives off a strange presence, each feels to be alive. I see images pouring from each as I move form one to the next. Each has their own effect upon my heart, my mind.
I continue to do this, holding my hand against each wall and closing my eyes longer and longer. Each streaming a different emotion into my body. Fear clouds my mind when I touch the black wall, sadness forms when I touch the grey, red breeds anger inside me and white forms of joy.
I then stand back, I move to where the walls narrow and start to examine the room. I notice a change, certain walls are taller than others now. The grey, and black wall are the highest. The white is the same and the red is just a little higher than the white.
In my curious observation I repeat the process again. I touch each wall with my eyes closed. I step back, again, the black and grey walls tower even higher. The white wall the same, the red, grows just a little higher.
I am puzzled by what I am seeing. I still know little of what this place is or how I got here. The walls that seep sadness and fear in me keep growing. Slowly constricting the glowing sky of blue above me. I can feel my heart growing with anxiety and sadness as the walls climb higher.
I look to myself with my eyes closed. I listen carefully as each wall has something to give. Fear, sadness, anger, and joy. Why these four and why are only fear and sadness growing? I start to look deeper, feeling every thought, every emotion, I recall all the doors I ever opened.
As I recall my thoughts and doors through out my woeful past. Most of all I see, are shades of grays and black. Clouding every emotion I have. Every door I took, was in fear or sadness. Opening them in hopes to escape. But only finding myself lost even more, returning to the doors I once came from.
These walls climb higher, for I give little my heart.
Do you emotions control you?
What emotions do you latch onto more than others?
Unlock emotions of the heart in, A Man's Traveled Heart
Coming soon, The Bleeding of Words
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